Wednesday, May 19, 2004

Bitching

Bitching aka backbiting aka slander seems to be an integral part of the organisational culture now-a-days. There is this one organisation, many of whose members I am familiar with, some very close. Being an outsider yet with some short of access to the going ons in this organization, I am very well aware of the internal politics and privy to some very delicate information (you can call it rumours or hearsay or simply gossip). As a result I am able to observe the idiosyncracies, insecurity, lust for power as well as other normal behaviour of the typical modern adult Malaysian from an observer status.

What I observe proves what many people have inferred at one time or other. OK ladies don’t get angry but I found out that in several organizations, women bitch the most and this particular organisation was no exception. Of course there are guys who love to bitch too but their number is still low. I also realized that the old saying, “women are their worst enemies,” is true. Maybe they don’t see men as a threat but most of the bitching by women is targeted at other women.

Well in this organization, there is this one old lady (OOL) (actually not so old) who is already up there but not at the top yet feels threatened by an upcoming brilliant lady (UBL). There is another old lady (AOL) (who’s old but looks young) who just got promoted to the upper level and has her head in the clouds. And she wonders why no one likes her.

In this case it's very easy to create a fire - no an explosion, with all the fuel I have. Just imagine, I can create a war by reporting to one individual what another individual had just told me and spicing it up a bit. However, being a strong believer in the principle of non-interference in other people’s affairs, I won’t. However, not everyone subscribes to this principle.

There was this one incident, where the OOL was rude to the UBL, just due to the fact that UBL did something which the top guy praised. UBL was a little pissed off and the whole organisation (well at least those present) knew.

Now the AOL come to the UBL and adds a little bit of oil to the sparks. UBL says something. AOL now spreads UBL’s reply with a little bit of spicing up. Now everyone in the organization: Bitch, Bitch, Bitch about OOL and UBL.

Thus it evolves until … I am sure you can imagine the ending. Well there I not an ending yet and it doesn’t look good with people adding more fuel.

I guess its human nature, we just love juicy stories. That's also the reason why newspapers and magazines carrying the latest scandal are sold out as soon as they hit the stands.

It's no wonder slander/gossip/backbiting is forbidden in Islam.
Also read this touching story: Speak No Evil: Why gossip is bad for your soul.

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